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You know you?re from Massachusetts if...

pocketbookThis list has been making its way around the web, and no one knows the original author, but this version was sent from the wilds of Hampshire County by Chris & Julie Cowan. Please add your reasons in the comment area below:

You know you’re from Massachusetts if:

  • You know what a pocketbook is
  • You call them what they really are “sneakers” (not “tennies”)
  • You think if someone is nice to you they either want something or they are from out of town
  • Orange LineThe public transportation system is known as the "T" and you'd rather drive in bumper to bumper traffic for 4 hours to get to Boston than be caught dead on the "Orange Line"
  • You could own a small town in Iowa for the cost of your house
  • There are 24 Dunkin Donuts shops within 15 minutes of your house and that is how you give directions
  • If you stay on the same road long enough it eventually has three different names
  • 53 degrees is "on the warm side"
  • Brigham'sYou've walked to Brigham's for an ice cream cone "to go" in the snow
  • You cringe every time you hear some actor/actress imitate the "Boston Accent" on TV
  • You call chocolate sprinkles "jimmies"
  • A water fountain is called a bubbler. Say it "bubbla".
  • You can go from one side of town to the other in less than fifteen minutes
  • You know how to pronounce towns like Worcester, Eastham, Chatham, Haverhill, Peabody, Scituate, and Leominster
  • You know what they sell at a "packie"
  • You keep an ice scraper in your car all year round
  • Paranoia sets in when you can't see a Dunkin Donuts, ATM or CVS
  • You've pulled out of a side street and used your car to block oncoming traffic so you can make a left
  • Christmas TreeYou've bragged about saving money at The Christmas Tree Shop
  • You know what a "regular coffee" is!
  • You can navigate a rotary without a problem
  • You use the words "wicked" "pissa" and "good" in the same sentence
  • You know what a frappe is
  • Saint Patrick's Day is your second favorite holiday
  • You drink tonic and would never consider using it on your hair
  • You never say "Cape Cod" you say "The Cape"
  • Route 495You went to Old Sturbridge Village and Plymouth Plantation at least once, in elementary school, but never to Bunka Hill
  • You know the Mass Pike and 495 create some sort of strange weather dividing line
PLUS: Your reasons below -

49 comments
Blog posts and comments are entirely the thoughts and ideas of the people who write them and in no way represent the views of CapeCodToday.com, eCape, Inc., or its employees or owners.

02/14/06 @ 1:07 pm
capemom [Member] writes:
All so, so true. Here are some other linguistic oddities: "dungarees" instead of jeans, "oleo" instead of margarine; "hamburg" instead of hamburger meat, "rubbish" instead of trash. (these are all currently used by my mother-in-law who hails from Southbridge.) Yes, I agree that TV and movies absolutely butcher the accent. Mass. natives butcher English enough as it is.
02/14/06 @ 1:11 pm
founder [Visitor] writes:
You know where N&S28 will take you, eventually
02/14/06 @ 2:21 pm
maverick [Visitor] writes:
You use Buddy Cianci as a reason Massachusetts politicians don't look that bad.
02/14/06 @ 2:26 pm
maverick [Visitor] writes:
you suggest the North End has the best Italian restaurants in the world.

Has anyone visited Federal Hill in Prov? At least you can park on your own.
02/14/06 @ 2:29 pm
maverick [Visitor] writes:
you stated that we voted in a Republican governor. We are bi-partisan.

Hello!
02/14/06 @ 2:32 pm
maverick [Visitor] writes:
Teddy made a mistake. Don't we all.

Let's live and forget.
02/14/06 @ 2:37 pm
maverick [Visitor] writes:
Cape Cod Today is such an unbiased source of information.

They support the big money.

Don't we all! That is the American way of life.

How patriotic we are.
02/14/06 @ 2:37 pm
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
You know where and what Spags is. Err, used to be.
02/14/06 @ 3:01 pm
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
you forgive the Big Dig for their rape of all of our taxpayer money.

The biggest dwelling in Harwich was recently built by the guy who owns the cranes used in the Big Dig.

We thought that the tearing down of homes and the new building was a hotel.
WRONG!

Just a private residence for one of the Big Dig bandits who owned the cranes.

I wonder how many homes Jim Gordon will be able to afford when the offshore Big Dig is consumated?
02/14/06 @ 3:05 pm
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
Anonymous...it is near dinner time. Please don't respond because I don't want to puke.

Talk to me about " BIG DIG II " in the AM.

If you insist I will do my best to tell you how I feel and get banned from CCT.
02/14/06 @ 3:11 pm
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
you think you have the best Mafia.

Your's is still run out of Providence and you don't know it.
02/14/06 @ 3:20 pm
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
you think Jack Coleman is a great blogger.

From afar PP, Bugsy, and Magical lead the race.

The rest are a distant second.

However, I do like Walter but he leans with the money trail. None of us are perfect.
02/14/06 @ 3:24 pm
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
WB...can I continue or am I close to being shut off.

I have many more comments.

Thanks

EDITOR's NOTE: You're doing fine, Mav, and I agree about Buddy & Federal Hill ('twas at L'Epicureo Saturday for the third time), but please stay on the subject - "You know you're from Mass. if..." not "How can I sneak in another personal (big) dig at Jim Gordon" who happens to be a very decent, self-made and hard-working guy who's had a lot of hard-earned success.

Your only possible error in this list: my bro-in-law insists that Trophy Dome overlooking Wychmere Harbor was built by the guy who rented those orange barrels to the UncommonWealth, not the cranes.
02/14/06 @ 4:01 pm
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
Thanks WB...I reported what I was told. Sorry For the misinformation. My mistake. I don't run with that crowd.

I don't know Jim and agree that he deserves whatever success he has worked hard for.

My problem is that the offshore deep water technology is coming to fruition as we speak.

CW has a leg up on everyone. Why not wait and explore a better alternative site?

I would support an offshore site. I am not against wind power.

The proposed site will effect a lot of people and wildlife. NOT ME.

Please take the time to find the right site.

Thanks WB for your honesty and patience with an old sea dog.
02/14/06 @ 4:02 pm
bryfry [Visitor] writes:
...if you think people from OTHER states drive bad.
02/14/06 @ 4:09 pm
bryfry [Visitor] writes:
...you know that you can drive faster in the breakdown lane.
02/14/06 @ 4:13 pm
bryfry [Visitor] writes:
...that there is a old chinese guy in the painting on the gas tank near Boston.
02/14/06 @ 4:16 pm
bryfry [Visitor] writes:
...your Democratic candidate for President loses the next election.
02/14/06 @ 4:17 pm
bryfry [Visitor] writes:
...you remember where the Combat Zone was.
02/14/06 @ 4:20 pm
CCToday [Member] writes:
You young'ins who don't remember the Vietnam "conflict" are unaware that the blue figure facing left on the "Old Chinese guy" on the Boston Gas tabnk on the Southeast Expressway resemble Ho Chi Minh who lead Vietnam to victory in several wars including ours.
02/14/06 @ 4:22 pm
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
"You know you’re from Massachusetts if..." you can remember when a Massachusetts Democrat WON a National Election - It was 1960 and Cape Cod's own JFK.
02/14/06 @ 4:23 pm
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
You're from Mass. if you remember which was the ONLY state to NOT vote for Nixon.
02/14/06 @ 4:29 pm
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
...you take your chowder (sorry, chowdah) very seriously and would rather take your own life than eat Manhattan chowder.
02/14/06 @ 4:31 pm
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
...you own more than one piece of clothing berating the New York Yankees
02/14/06 @ 4:43 pm
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
Anonymous...I am starting to like you.

I was on a mission the day JFK was shot. On landing I learned of the news.

Spent the rest of the day crying and looking for updates.

What a loss.
02/14/06 @ 5:01 pm
GreatGadfly [Visitor] writes:
If:

You still call it gahbige (not trash).

You think turn signals are a useless accessory.

You know the turn signal on the car in front of you means aboslutely nothing.

You consider the break down lane a passing lane.

You know that a "Townie" is someone from Charlestown.

You know that the Winter Hill Mob was a Somerville gang, not the title of an Alec Guinness film.

You identify your origins according to what Dorchester parish you grew up in.

You remember drinking under age at Joe Tecci's, from navy mugs, when Tecci's had no licquor license, or common victualer's license, or occupancy permit for their restaurant right behind City Hall.

You remember the GIQ, Carling's and the biggest sundaes in the world at Bailey's.

You remember George Frazier holding court at his corner of the bar in downstairs bar at Lochober's (before women were allowed).

You remember John McCormac (speaker of the U.S. House) holding court every Friday night at the big round table facing the water at Jimmy's Harborside.

You rememember watching submarine races at the beach.
02/14/06 @ 5:25 pm
Smurf [Visitor] writes:
You Know You're From Massachusetts When...

The person driving in front of you is going 70 mph and you are cursing him for going too slow. (Damn school zones)



When ordering a tonic, you mean a Coke...not quinine water. (I've had detectives look up from their meals in cafes when I asked for Coke.)


You almost feel disappointed when someone doesn't flip you the bird when you cut them off or steal their parking space. (I tell people to **** thmselves when they don't let me pull out quickly enough, and I'm not even a native)



You know how to pronounce the names of towns like Worcester, Billerica, Haverhill, Scituate, Gloucester, Duxbury and Cotuit. (Try spelling it out in the comments section)Add your own



You have driven to New Hampshire on a Sunday in order to get beer. (Blue Laws)



You know that there are two Bulger brothers, and thatthey're both crooks. (Ironically, I would trust the gangster more than the State Senator)



You know what they sell at a packie. (I go to the "liqour store" .... my husband goes to the "packy"... it's the same place.)
02/14/06 @ 5:26 pm
Smurf [Visitor] writes:
You actually enjoy driving around rotaries. (I stay in them, occasionally.. and Duxbury just built a Roundabout, of all the ****** things)


You know at least one bar where you can get something to drink after last call. (It's called "Every Bar.")



You can actually find your way around Boston. (Well.... that stupid Big Dig thing screwed everything up, right when i thought I had it down!!)



Evacuation Day is a recognized holiday. (I have never taught a class on Evacuation Day, and would take it off even if I taught in Arizona.)



You know what First Night is. (It's actually Last Night, and the following First morning.")



You know at least one guy named Sean, Pat, Whitey, Red, Bud, Sully or Seamus. (If you could combine Sloan and Shea's dating resume into that of one rather prolific sister, she'd have dated a man with each of those names.)



You think the rest of the country owes you for Thanksgiving and Independence Day. (and St. Patrick's Day....and Patriot's Day....and they do owe us.)



You have never been to Cheers. (It's The Bull And Finch Pub,
02/14/06 @ 5:28 pm
Smurf [Visitor] writes:
You have gone to at least one party at UMass. (I've been to parties at THREE UMasses)



The curse of the Bambino is taught in public schools. (Guilty)



You own a "Yankees Suck" shirt or hat. (I become angry when Southereners refer to me as a "Yankee.")



You think Doug Flutie is the greatest athlete ever. (For Boston, For Boston...)



You remember exactly where you were when the ball rolled through Buckner's legs. (grrr)



You (USED TO) pray for the Red Sox to win the World Series not this season, but in your lifetime. (I steal from old sites)



You know how to make a frappe. (Watch Southerners get really angry at a Falmouth Dairy Queen when no ice cream is added to their Milkshake.)



You know that "Big Dig" is also a kind of ice cream you can get at Brigham's. (Just may go there this evening, as my schedule brings me past one)



You actually know how to merge from 6 lanes of traffic down to one. (The key is to have your nose ahead of whoever you are cutting off, for insurance liability purposes)
02/14/06 @ 5:29 pm
Smurf [Visitor] writes:
Don't you just lovvvvvve a bargain?
02/14/06 @ 5:30 pm
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
GG...Right On.

Narraganset Beer that supported the Bosox in the lean years when Teddy Ballgame was the only news in town.

Whitey and the gang that Boston would like to forget. But was more influential than the politicians.

We may be losing our hair but I feel we have more common sense than all of the Yuppies put together.

God bless them because they are soon to be on there own. And if they don't get their s**t together the muslims are going to kick their ass.
02/14/06 @ 5:30 pm
Smurf [Visitor] writes:
You've bragged about the money you've saved at The Christmas Tree Shop.

You keep an ice scraper and can of de-icer on the floor of your car...year round (They come in handy for deterring car-jackers)



You still try to order curly fries from Burger King (The chief benefit of Pizza Boy in Wareham- 508-295-2095- is that they have Curly fries and superb thin crust pizza.)



You order iced coffee in January. (This isn't as wierd as it sounds. Water- the primary ingredient in ice- freezes at 32 degrees. The air outside is 10 degrees. Therefore, iced coffee will warm you in the right weather conditions. This knowledge is essentially why we beat Indianapolis in football every January)



You know what candlepin bowling is (It used to beat the Patriots' TV ratings right up until Parcells got here. Tt's also a sport I am incapable of playing, for reasons far beyond my refusal to wear second-hand shoes.)



You drive 45 minutes to New Hampshire to save $5 in sa
02/14/06 @ 7:57 pm
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
You use "wicked good" and "wicked bad" appropriately
02/14/06 @ 8:18 pm
Crusader [Visitor] writes:
You listen to Howie Carr faithfully & call in every two weeks to talk about local dirt.

You can't wait to buy Howie's book on the Bulger brothers because it's good local dirt about local gangsters.

You will always be a Red Sox diehard fan because you like to be a martyr.

You will always be a Patriots fan because they make you proud.

You love to hate republicans.

The politicians you do like will always help you jump through hoops when you need a favor.

You know they will want you to return the favor when they run for office, like holding a sign at your neighborhood corner during a rainstorm in cold November weather and calling voters.

You don't care because you will ask for more favors -like your brother needs a job at the DPW.

You can call your local cop buddy who will fix your speeding ticket because his buddy the local mechanic is a mutual long time friend.

You know you are in Massachusetts because this same cop drives drunk all the time & never gets bagged.

Your common words of slang are:

Come'on, whaaateverrr, Gimme a break! &
screw
02/14/06 @ 9:00 pm
Crusader [Visitor] writes:
You will always love the Kennedy's because they are Massachusetts!, even if lots of people hate them, in yours eyes they can do no wrong.

You loved Tip O'Neil because he was from North Cambridge which was walking distance from your hometown.

You love to ride the buses, especially the electric trolleys of N.Cambridge that Tip put in.

You faithfully watch the annual St. Patty's Day politicians breakfast on channel 5 because the political hackers make you laugh and show their true Southie Color.

You practically live at Home Depot.

Your son still likes to get his haircut at the local barbershop because the barber has been cutting his hair since he was 5.

You know you are from Massachusetts when your local politician still calls you just to say hello.
02/14/06 @ 9:34 pm
altar boy [Visitor] writes:
you cuss out the red sox at the game, but, are absolutely brutal to the other team.
You have fights with out of town ball teams, but unite when playing out of staters, also known as foriegners.
You've never heard of Victory over Japan Day. Come to think of it, no one else has either.
You think the people on the cape are snobs, and you're right.
You think the people in western Mass are hicks, right again.
But at least they don't talk stupid like the folks from Boston- I threw my tonic at the big screen during 'good will hunting' -the accents were so wicked messed up.
02/15/06 @ 8:27 am
Maverick [Visitor] writes:
you think a sleeping state trooper is required at every construction site.

you vote for anyone named Kennedy regardless of their qualifications.
02/15/06 @ 9:46 am
Crusader [Visitor] writes:
You know you are in Massachusetts, when you see the unattentive state trooper eating and flicking peanut shells on the ground with his head down, at a busy intersection, while dependent drivers are hoping he will stop eating peanuts, do his job and redirect traffic!
02/15/06 @ 11:00 am
venice [Visitor] writes:
You know that you go down to Provincetown and up to Falmouth.

You know it's spring when the Seafood Sam's radio commercials start up again.

You know you're old because you remember the Thompson's Clam Bar commercials, and know all the words!
02/15/06 @ 3:10 pm
i'm not anonymous [Visitor] writes:
Wicked Pissa!

Hey! Where ya goin? ...
02/16/06 @ 12:33 am
still [Visitor] writes:
You know more swear words than anyone. You use the 'F' word casually, and get banned for doing so. Like, 'effen A', though these wags can't stand Massachusetts, because it seems we invented the word. You also know one thousand ways to use it, though this will never see the light of day.
02/16/06 @ 10:22 am
Cape10s [Visitor] writes:
A whiffle is a crew cut not a type of ball.
You think fluff is a food group.
Boston IS the center of the universe.
You miss Bradlees.
Patriot's Day, February vacation?
It doesn't bother you that Mitt Romney was never a MA resident or held political office before he was elected governor.
You can understand Mayor Menino when he talks.
If you live on the South Shore or Cape you think wastewater treatment plants are for sissys and way too expensive. Hey if you build it, people might move here.
Wonder how anyone could live on the Cape, because "All the traffic"
(Someone from Braintree actually said that to me).
That's the nuts or that's balls.
You know what a jug handle is.
You call it a rubbish barrell instead of a trash can.
Understand that's it's an honor to live in such a cool place.
02/16/06 @ 10:27 am
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
Missing Bradlees. Good one. Anybody remember Zayre & Caldor?
02/16/06 @ 12:01 pm
venice [Visitor] writes:
how about the old Compass Lounge, and the White Swan? and Tastee Tower of Pizza and the original Storyland?
02/16/06 @ 1:29 pm
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
I do remember Zayre, can't place Caldor. And how about King's Department store across from the airport?
02/16/06 @ 4:53 pm
Great Gadfly [Visitor] writes:
Cape10s,

Mitt Romney graduated from both the Harvard Business School and Harvard Law School. He was a founding partner in a Boston venture capital firm where he made a fortune, some of it by backing Massachusetts start-ups (Staples, for one)and has owned a house in Belmont, where he raised his children, for decades. He was very much a Masachusetts resident when he ran for U.S. Senate in the 90's.

You know you are from Massachusetts if you know all this.
02/16/06 @ 6:25 pm
Anonymous [Visitor] writes:
If you'd rather ride with Ted Kennedy than hunt with Dick Cheney
02/17/06 @ 5:18 pm
Honest Observer [Visitor] writes:
if you would prefer riding with Anonymous than Dick Cheney.
02/17/06 @ 6:55 pm
Lie [Visitor] writes:
sic
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Blogeto, ergo sum.
I blog, therefore I am.

Walter Brooks is the cctoday publisher & editor and a lifelong journalist who has worked in media on Cape Cod since '65.
Julie Brooks is the president & founder of eCape.com. She is Walter's daughter-in-law.

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