Project I.E.P.

Can You Make a PB-J Sandwich?

Nothing is more comforting that a squishy white bread peanut butter and jelly sandwich. However, could you make that sandwich if all you had was bread? You could dig through the cabinets for peanut butter and in the fridge for jelly but you keep turning up with empty handed. Maybe you didn't know that you needed to go out and search for peanut butter and jelly to make that sandwich happen. 

This is the same rationale you need when you want to make an information sandwich, without the right ingredients' you're going to spend a lot of time eating dry bread. You can't spread a big helping of knowledge without having a jar overflowing with information. Every parent owes it to their child to step outside of their comfort zone and start doing what they can to make a difference in their child's life, both educationally and emotionally. It's time to go out and learn how to make a sandwich. Stop packing your child's lunch with dry bread.

What brought on this philosophical peanut butter and jelly analogy? A terrifying event that happens about this time of year, and no, I'm not talking about seeing snowflakes, I'm talking about the first report cards of the year coming home to parents.

For a child with an undiagnosed learning disability brining home their report card is equal to getting a filling without Novocain. It might start out ok but when the Dentist reaches the tooths nerve, Bam! you experience a pain like nothing you've every felt. Brining home a report card can bring on the same feeling. Children become anxious anticipating the disappoint of their parents, the fighting, the proverbial "try harder, focus" speech that accompanies a report card filled with less than brilliant grades and if you're really unlucky comments that a well meaning educator included hoping to make a difference in what they perceive as the child's "crazy, lazy, stupid" attitude.

Let me take this opportunity to pause and say, "STOP! NO MORE!"

These students are often working twice as hard as their non-disabled peers are. Do not, for a second, think that they are not aware they aren't keeping up believe me they know. Stop and take ten minutes to think back to what school was like. If you were fortunate enough to have a pleasant run of the mill experience, call a sibling or a relative whose experience wasn't' so shiny and let them tell you about the ridicule, embarrassment, and humiliation that came with not learning the same way as everyone else. Ask them to describe, in as much detail as possible, what they felt like.

Listen hard because you're likely to hear the pain in their voice about how the teacher didn't understand why they didn't "get it" like everyone else or hearing their parents voices and seeing the anger in their eyes when they glazed over at the sight of another failing report card. Stop putting that kind of pain on your child, they deserve to know that you're there to help them, whatever way you can. It's time to learn what kind of sandwich your child is eating and find out where you can get the ingredients to make one.

For the educators, please stop using the words "lazy and focus" or the phrase, "if student X only applied themselves..." this is the one of the most insulting things you could say to a child who needs to receive the information you're presenting differently. They aren't lazy; in fact, they probably have to try twice as hard as their peers do. Consider lazy, crazy, and stupid as dirty words, if you wouldn't let you're classroom full of 8 years olds drop an occasional "F" bomb at you, then don't drop these "F" bomb equivalents at them.

If you cannot say the sentence, "I suspect that your son or daughter has a learning disability."

Then schedule a meeting with the parents, even if it's on the phone or by email, and let the parents know you'd like to work together with them to help their son or daughter. Do not dump it in the lap of the students and their families and expect them to magically transform the way their brain is wired, it is not going to happen.

Parents sometimes don't realize there is anything they can do to help their child, other than lecturing and forcing them to the kitchen table for semi-supervised homework.

Here are a few tips to get you and your child on their road to a more enjoyable school experience: 

• Start by requesting, in writing, that your child's school provide your son or daughter with an educational evaluation. Once the letter is received by the school, they are required by law to provide the evaluation.

"A State educational agency, other State agency, or local educational agency [school district] shall conduct a full and individual initial evaluation ... either the parent of a child, or a State education agency, other State agency, or local educational agency may initiate a request for an initial evaluation to determine if the child is a child with a disability." 20 USC 1414(a)(1)

I'd like to note here, that I have heard many stories about parents being called into meeting after requesting an evaluation to hear that their child doesn't need an evaluation. Instead, they need a trip to the pediatrician because they have ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). Some schools have even gone as far as telling parent the child can't attend school unless they are medicated. This is against the law, so if you are involved in this type of discussion, kindly let the school know, in writing of course, that they can continue their evaluations and that any discussion regarding medication are between you and your child's doctor.

Keep in mind that ADHD symptoms often are the same symptoms as anxiety or depression, which can be very common in a child who is struggling in school.

Once you have requested the evaluation, it will take several months to complete. The laws and regulations that govern the periods for completing an evaluation are based on school days. That means all the vacations and professional days that might fall in the calendar won't count toward the completion of the evaluation.

While you are waiting for the evaluation results to come back, Take an opportunity to learn what these test results might mean. Here is a quick example of what might come your way:

In the mail comes a copy of a reading evaluation. It says that your child is working at the low average scoring an 80. Would it surprise you to learn that the average score on that test was 90 to 110? Low average would be the 90-93 range, not 80. It is important to understand the scoring of the tests. A score of eighty means that are working below the average and this area of the testing should be explored. Here is an example of what a good evaluation might look like, http://tinyurl.com/goodeval . For some great examples and articles about disabilities, evaluations and such visit the Wright's Law website, http://tinyurl.com/testsandevals .  

• Next, please call, email, or drop a note to the teacher and ask to meet with them. Ask them if there are any ways for you to volunteer in the classroom, can you grade papers, read books, anything that might free up their time and give them an opportunity to work one on one with students who might need it. Find out what they need and then figure out a way to get it for them.

 Teacher have students learning all over the scale with some students needing more challenging work, while others needs one on one/small group instruction. A teacher can only stretch her/himself so far. An extra set of hands doing some of the little things in a classroom might be just what a teacher needs.

•  Visit, www.time4learning.com a great website that offers very low-cost computerized tutoring, $19.95 a month to be exact. It offers programming up to grade 8 but if your student is working below grade level, you can have the programming geared toward whatever grade level they are working at. That means if you have a fourth grader, who is struggling at the 2^nd or 3^rd grade level in Math or Language Arts, you can have them working at the 2^nd or 3^rd grade level. This will help boost their skills and you will start to see a difference in their learning. Completing one lesson takes about fifteen minutes a night, which isn't a lot if you consider what kids might otherwise be doing for those fifteen minutes.

 These are just some basic steps that will help you start to ease you're child's fear about school and learning. Kids are always looking for a superhero and it shouldn't be a cartoon character or a vampire in a movie, it should be their parents.

PBJ Phantom, signing off.