The Opinionator

No On Question One

No On Question One

A nuclear bomb and two firecrackers.

The three statewide ballot questions we are facing this November 4 make up important parts of the state's business. They are far from equal in their consequences and cost to the quality of life here on the Cape. These three questions constitute a nuclear weapon and two firecrackers. This piece is about the potential nuclear destruction of Question One. The other two questions, regarding marijuana and dog racing will have marginal impacts no matter what happens, although there is strong feeling out there regarding them, pro and con.

 It defies imagination how Question One on the ballot November 4 is going to get any yes votes whatsoever except from the angriest and most disruptive and punitive of voters. Voting to eliminate the state income tax is like voting on not eating dinner any more.  No one is going to seriously do it.  I find it hard to believe that The Cape Cod Today poll on this question defeated it by a mere 56% to 44%.  Are there really so many people out there who want to kill the government? 

 Perhaps they don't understand that if the state income taxes vanish, so will 11 billion dollars of revenue, resulting in a combination of an increased sales tax, massive cuts and/or shifting of tax burdens from state incomes to the local property tax. (That should be easy, given how much we all love overrides.) It would be an unbelievable shift, an appalling testimony to the problems of government by referendum.  Referenda, when it comes to gauging public sentiment on an issue may have some value, but when it comes to formulation of law and tax policy there are some serious drawbacks to reducing important questions to simple black and white terms which can't help but miss all kinds of important details.

 Our embrace of the Constitution and its inclusion of fundamental values, principles and freedoms insured America would be a government of law and not men, thereby protecting the rights of the minority over sometimes the will of the majority.  The elimination of slavery, the women's right to vote movement, the civil rights agenda, became realities because of our Constitution's structure and flexibility.  These may not have received popular support when laws were enacted if these issues were subject to referendum.  

 Taxing policy should not be dictated by referendum either.   Our elected representatives should be accountable to insure the cost of governing today should be offset with revenues collected today to pay for such.  If they can't do that, they should be removed from office. 

This year in particular the cost of governing at the local and state level is exceeding tax receipts.   Nationwide, cities and towns are experiencing the perfect fiscal storm.  For the first time in thirty years, sales tax revenues, income tax revenues, and property tax revenues are less than last year.  Cutting state income tax revenues by an additional forty percent by referendum is similar to throwing kerosene on a burning building.   The fire may glow for a while, but the damage will be unimaginable.

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On-line Advertising Standards

On-line Advertising Standards

Has anyone noticed the strange ads that show up on the  web sites you'd least suspect, like the Wall Street Journal, Drudge, New York Times, Huffington Post, Salon and CNN? One ad making the rounds lately show a close-up of a goofy looking woman saying something like, "Dreaming of a bigger penis?  Try Vimax pills." Or "Surprise her with a bigger penis." I know that former presidential candidate Bob Dole represented Depends and fought erectile dysfunction, but I don't remember him being conspicuous in the mainstream media. It's kind of embarrassing to run into pop-ups about that stuff on all my favorite web sites.

Is this some kind of joke?  How do we complain about that kind of nonsense?  If anyone knows how, give a shout on this blog. It's tastelessness beyond belief.  Does not obsession with a better orgasm represent  a contradiction when supported by journalism which focuses on world and national policies and problems. Maybe I am just an old fuddy-duddy, changed by blood pressure pills and aging. I have found that the older I get the more chaste I become.

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Let's Privatize Public Libraries

Like we've privatized our wars?

Some people are totally convinced that the government screws up everything it attempts.  The words government bureaucracy usually connote red tape, incompetence, overpaid hacks in no-show positions, and ever changing priorities depending on whatever politician seems to be the man or woman of the hour.  For these haters of government, these believers in government inefficiency, turning things over to the private sector is the way to go.  Privatization for many is a panacea.

 It pops up at all levels.

Want to win the war? Turn the fighting over to Halliburton or Blackwater. Why risk the lives of our soldiers when there are mercenaries unimpeded by annoyances such as the civil code or the U.S. Constitution?

 Unhappy with public schools?  Shut them down whenever you can and turn the education over to charter schools, vouchers, choice schools and private ones. Let people choose the kind of education they want for their children.  So what if now and then we have a Nazi, KKK, or Al Qaeda school?  Citizens deserve whatever schools they want for their kids. Get the selfish labor unions out of the picture and use your taxes for the kind of education you want. See here.

 Why tolerate confiscatory taxes?  If we turned government over to private companies, they could eliminate costly pension plans and cut way back on fringe benefits.  They wouldn't have to deal with all the crap of public sector unions working out the agendas of selfish politicians who don't care about the little guy.

A library like grandmother's living room

Citizens plead for "their" libraries
   More than 100 people, primarily seniors, turned out at a public forum last night to speak about the state of municipal budget cuts and how they will affect the town's library services.
   The residents overwhelmingly expressed displeasure at the possibility that one of the town's three library branches might soon be closed. They pleaded with members of the library board to keep "their" library open no matter what was cut from the three libraries collectively to do so.
   Much of last night's rancor was directed toward board members who chose to recommend such a plan to selectmen. They were also criticized for not bringing the figures used to support their decision... CC Times,Oct. 7, 2008.

 The news this week was all about Yarmouth and their three miniature libraries. Visiting them is kind of like visiting grandmother's living room. In order to handle budget cuts, the library people are thinking about closing one and/or fragmenting hours beyond belief so you never know when they are open. This crazy hours business has worked with some of the landfills down here on the Cape, there's no reason why it shouldn't work for libraries.

 People showed up at a library hearing and complained loudly that they do not want this to happen. Agreed, that there is deep support for these little libraries, but it is not very broad. A mile deep but an inch wide.

 How about turning over the whole she-bang to the private sector? People could rent books and computer time to do research. Handle it like a video rental store.  As more and more homes get computers, one must ask how relevant the research aspect of libraries has become.

 When I was a kid, every family tried to invest in a set of encyclopedias to proudly adorn their living room wall.  Kids could use them for school projects.  It was a status symbol to have a set of a fine encyclopedia in your home, and if you couldn't find what you were looking for you could go to the local library where there were four or five sets.  Today, we simply Google for the information and the universe of articles becomes available at the speed of light.  Plus you can command the machine to print out whatever you are seeing on the screen.  We just don't need libraries anymore for their reference function. Even the best seller function is lessened.  You can buy hard cover versions of these books at B.J.'s or Stop and Shop, often for under $10.00.

 Jackson County, Oregon is hiring a firm to run its library. The big private company will use its buying muscle to get volume discounts on books and will handle hiring and firing.  Salaries will be comparable, but benefits will be reduced, replacing expensive pension plan with 401 (k) programs. They won't keep them open all the time and will save money this way, needing only 50 employees, down from the present 88 people. Collection development will probably suffer because professional librarians will go elsewhere, preferring not to be subject to free market demands instead of scholarly ones.

There is a moral argument that taxpayers should not be burdened with the costs of maintaining public libraries. It is common for many people to decline the use of library services, yet they are taxed to support them.  At least school taxes are payback  for when we were educated with public dollars.  Furthermore, it is questionable if taxpayers should be forced to fund library materials they find objectionable.  Just as many conservatives objected to tax supported art such as Robert Mapplethorpe's photography, others may object to paying for pornographic westerns, Rush Limbaugh books or Left Behind recordings with their tax dollars.  In a private library, people can choose whose ideas to support with their money.

Last spring the Boston Globe reported two Massachusetts towns weighing the possibility of privatizing libraries. Towns already charge for school sports, kindergarten and bussing to and from school, Why not extends this to the libraries? The towns of Tewksbury and Dartmouth, facing library budgets forcing overrides, were looking into the option of turning the whole program over to a private company.

Privatized libraries are not unheard of in other states. A Maryland-based company, Library Systems and Services LLC, called LSSI, runs 65 library branches in four states. Generally, LSSI will not hire unionized employees, helping it to save on benefits packages.

The Globe story quotes Robert Ferrari of Tewksbury who said he believes that private companies are held to stricter standards:

"I'm pro-privatizing as much of government as possible. The government cannot run anything that a business couldn't do better."

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Yarmouth Seaside Festival

Yarmouth Seaside Festival

Don't forget the 30^th annual Yarmouth Seaside Festival this coming Columbus Day weekend.  It's the culmination of many months of planning by a small band of dedicated volunteers.  The big days are Saturday and Sunday.  Sunday at noon there is a parade along Route 28 from Capt. Parker's Pub to the State Police Barracks.  The focal point for the weekend is the field beside the MacArthur School in Yarmouth, on Route 28, across the street from the State Police Barracks.  There will be a huge crafts fair, a flat bed truck with entertainment, lots of food, and many kiddie events. Activities include fireworks, a band concert and exhibits by local agencies.  This is a long tradition in Yarmouth and seems to grow every year. It's one of the few things left where you don't have to pay admission to attend.

You can find a complete schedule for the whole shebang on Cape Cod Today's calendar of events. It promises to be a wonderful autumn weekend. Lots of good weather forecast, bring your camera and your kids.

Visit the Yarmouth Seaside Festival's official website here.

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Happy Birthday Julie Andrews

Happy Birthday Julie Andrews

In 1960 I fell madly in love with the young actress and singer Julie Andrews. I would listen to her sing the melodies of "My Fair Lady" and dream of our life together.  In later years when she became Mary Poppins, our love persevered.

I was startled to learn that she turned 73 on October 1. To commemorate that she made a special appearance  at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of AARP. She sang the show stopping "My Favorite Things" from the legendary "Sound of Music" and received a standing ovation. Here are the lyrics, so you can sing it yourself:

Botox  and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and  handrails  and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in  string,
These are a few of my favorite  things.

Cadillacs  and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and  false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with  swings,
These are a few of my favorite  things.

When  the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go  bad,
I simply  remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel  so bad.

Hot  tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food  cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they  bring,
These are a few of my favorite  things.

Back  pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and  fractures and hair that is thinnin',  
And we won't mention our  short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite  things.

When  the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the  eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,  
And then I don't feel so  bad.

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All Puns Intended

ALL PUNS INTENDED

A little Internet humor for a Monday morning...

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

4. A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm, and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

7. "Doc, I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home."
     "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
     "Is it common?"
     "Well, It's Not Unusual."

8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field.
     Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
     "I don't believe you," says Dolly.
     "It's true; no bull!" exclaims Daisy.

9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.

12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident.
       He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!"
       The doctor replied, "I know, I amputated your arms!"

13. I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!"

16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Not surprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel, and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office, and asked them to disperse.
"But why," they asked, as they moved off.
"Because," he said. "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."

18. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in  Egypt , and is named 'Ahmal.' The other goes to a family in  Spain ; they name him 'Juan.' Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."

19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him (oh, man, this is so bad, it's good)... a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

20. A dwarf, who was a mystic, escaped from jail. The call went out that there was a small medium at large

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Kiss of Peace

We have a thing we do at my church at almost every service.  At some point in the ceremony the clergyman looks up and asks us to share a kiss of peace with the persons sitting near us.  This ancient and beautiful rite comes from the early days of the church and is referenced multiple times in scripture. While no one today puckers their lips or gets lipstick on anyone, it is a gesture of wishing your fellow traveler in the Christian community the very best.  It's accompanied by the words, "Peace be with you" and is usually responded to as "And with your spirit." Or "You too." Some people just say "Peace," shake hands or flash the victory sign.  Others, if they know you by name may use it, as in: "Peace be with you, Michael."

 When I was a young man I spent some time with monks in a monastery.  That is when I first saw the kiss of peace.  In those days it was kind of a formal thing.  Two monks would face each other, grab each other, with both hands of one monk cupping the elbows of the other one, bob their heads toward the left shoulders of each other and whisper, "Peace be with you."  It was a solemn and beautiful thing, particularly when the monks were wearing the hoods on their habits.  It was right out of the Middle Ages.  We were irreverent in those days and sometimes the kiss of peace would carry another message instead of the formula one.  We might say," Your breath smells like cigarettes" and our partner might respond, "I just put one out before chapel." But the intent was always serious, two Christians embracing and wishing peace for each other."

 Over the years in church I have seen this ritual evolve.  The elbow grabbing business is gone now, and you can see simple handshakes and/or smiles when the kiss of peace is exchanged. Sometimes husbands and wives actually kiss, or parents may plant a kiss on the cheek of their child. I've been at church with my pregnant daughter and have touched her stomach and said "Peace." On a day when there is practically no one at church you might catch someone waving at you from ten pews in front. 

 Some people don't go for this and would rather be left alone.  They want no mandatory interaction with anyone around them.  That is why I've noticed the preacher, when he announces the kiss, always says, "...for those who wish, please offer a kiss of peace."

 I do like the ritual.  It's not the least bit demanding or intrusive.  For me it's far preferable than those invitations from the pulpit to "take a few minutes and introduce yourself to the people around you, get to know each other."  One might feel a little resentment toward a preacher who would require one to do that. The kiss of peace really only requires a smile.  Sometimes a true zealot will be in the church when the kiss is given.  He or she will leave the pew and go up and down the aisle shaking hands, as if campaigning for office on the way to a rally.

 It's a simple gesture but one which is pretty close to the heart of the matter. Christians are social animals, we row in the same boat and are hoping to go to the same place. It is a tiny thing but it is important to physically touch someone and to look into their face.  The sentiment is the very essence of what we should want for ourselves and others.  Peace.

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Life in the 1500's

 Back in the 16thy Century
I get lots of e-mail and sometimes they are very funny jokes or interesting information.  I got this the other day, author unknown.  Maybe it's all urban legend, but as a lover of history, I found these factoids interesting.

 June Weddings
Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and still smelled pretty good by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor.  Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Babies and Bath Water
Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it.  Hence the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the bath water."

Raining Cats and Dogs
Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and off the roof. Hence the saying "It's raining cats and dogs."

Dirt Poor and Thresh hold
the floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying "dirt poor." The wealthy had slate floors  that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they  spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until when you opened the door it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entranceway. Hence the words "thresh hold."
 
Peas Porridge Hot
In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire.  Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme, "Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old."

 Poison Tomatoes
Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Upper Crust
Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or upper crust."

Dead Ringer

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a "bone-house" and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift") to listen for the bell; thus, someone could  be saved by the/"/bell" or was considered a "dead  ringer."

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Campaign Fatigue

 It's hard to find objective reporting

I think I suffer from campaign fatigue.  For almost two years it has been going on.  There are no issues left to learn about and debate.  In a recent poll in Cape Cod Today they asked what does it for me in assessing a candidate.  I said hair style and I voted more than once. It's silly season for me when it comes to the campaign.

I don't even like to watch the jumping monkeys on MSNBC anymore.  I've turned against Mika Brezsinski. She can play "yes man" to Joe Scarborough anytime she wants.   The next time Chris Matthews wants to shout at the camera that some speech is giving him goose bumps, I hope my television is turned off.  There is just so much of this constant hype that anyone can take.  I've had it.

 Now I'm not saying that I prefer giggling with Al and Meredith on the Today Show.  I can do just fine without celebrating Al Roker's 54^th birthday. 

 There was a time, many months ago, when my relationship with the giants of print columnists was healthier and a source of real pleasure.  I would eagerly drink the Kool Aid of Maureen Down and Frank Rich of the NYT every time their columns came out.  I would tirelessly write comments to their pieces on the online blogs; I learned that it is even possible to shout with the written word.  It's all about picking the right verb and adverbs.

One day I recall observing that these favorite columnists have much more fun tearing ideas and people down then building them up.  They don't seem to like anyone very much and enjoy telling you why every time they put pen to paper. Their disdain for the Bush White House goes without saying. McCain is just an aging clone of the current president, and the Clintons?  Hillary is the wicked witch of the west, and Bubba, the big dog, can do nothing right.  Sometimes they liked John Edwards, but then infidelity to his wife blew him apart.

 Toward the end it became clear that Obama was their man.  The MSNBC monkeys tended to coronate him last winter before most of the primaries were over. Now I'm reading and hearing that they are starting to be critical of him with questions like, "Where's the beef?" and reminding us again and again that they think he's short on specifics.

 The other night I listened to Hillary's speech.  I was so tired of MSNBC fawning over Obama that I decided to listen to the post speech analysis on Fox News. That was no treat either.  They hated almost everything she said. In particular they were mad at her because she didn't say Obama was ready to be president. She didn't say he had enough experience.  They really hated that. So I left Fox News and went to MSNBC.  They were treating the speech as if it were the second coming. "She couldn't have done better!" they shouted.  These were the same guys demonizing her when she lied about the Bosnia airport and dared to refer to the assassination of RFK.

 The same thing happened when McCain picked Governor Palin of Alaska to be his running mate. The media were split on their reactions, depending on their politics. Billy Kristol of Fox News was excited at McCain's Hail Mary pass.  MSNBC said the move took the "not enough experience" issue of the table.  Rush Limbaugh surprised.  He called her a "babe" which I guess is an insult.  Some NYT columnist wrote a column against her called Baked Alaska.

 Lately I have come to like the writing of Peggy Noonan of the Wall Street Journal. She is sort of an expert on damning with faint praise.  While desperately partisan, she can bring herself to be critical of President Bush and can say nice things about Bill Clinton.  She doesn't see much good in Hillary and is starting to paint Obama with the same brush.  She says things like, "He's handsome but a mystery man" and "He doesn't come from anywhere."

 It's hard to find objective reporting. My son-in-law reminds me that I must make my own decision about what is truth.  I find that hard to do lately since I start to fall asleep when the speeches start. Maybe I should deal with campaign fatigue by taking the television out of my bedroom.

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Whom Do You Throw Overboard?

Whom Do You Throw Overboard?

The recent experience of a district meeting by the citizens of Dennis and Yarmouth give cause to think about regionalization and the ramifications of that decision dozens of years ago.

When two towns vote to regionalize they give up some of their municipal autonomy in favor of the advantages that come to it by getting together.  It's a partnership for better or for worse, it's a marriage, a real legal commitment to each other.

Residents of the school district may fail to grasp the ramifications of this decision to get married. When they do this both towns are rewarded with institutional economies of scale such as a single curriculum, a single central office governing facility and the ability and responsibility of sharing just about everything else. They have also received millions of dollars in extra state aid to education, offered by the Commonwealth to get towns to regionalize and share resources.

Sometimes people can't believe that residents of one town have the authority to make decisions which affect the pocketbooks of the residents of another town.  They assume their selectmen are the ultimate governing authority and can't believe that things go on over which the selectmen have no control.

They can't believe that school committees have as much authorities as selectmen and that a school district is not town "A" nor town "B" but a third political entity as different from the two member towns of a region as from some other town miles away.

When we had the district meeting I read one letter to the editor written by a resident who was amazed that the school committee had the final word on the size of its budget, regardless of the decision of any town meeting in any town or even any district meeting  or election.  The writer asks, "How can that happen in a democracy?"  The answer is that our democracy believes that some things, some issues, are so important they must be protected from the vicissitudes which can befall a moment at a town or district meeting.

They must be protected from the momentary tyranny of the majority.

These battles between member towns and regional school districts will go on for a long time given the constraints on taxes imposed 25 years ago with the passage of Proposition 2 and ½. 

With energy costs growing in leaps and bounds, insurance premiums always creeping upward, general inflation doing its thing, and labor unions and management negotiating even tiny annual raises for employees, it becomes virtually impossible to govern a whole and complete town, i.e.: schools, police, fire, libraries, highways, etc. inside the boundaries of Proposition 2 and ½ .   For today's Massachusetts department heads, it's like being the captain of a lifeboat afloat in an angry sea and having to decide every year whom to throw overboard.

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