A Summer in Time

Chapter XIII: "The World on a String"

A SUMMER IN TIME by Norman H. Goroshnik
CHAPTER XIII: ACROSS THE MILES: "A WORLD ON A STRING"

Blair's parents came home from the lecture at Brown University and asked how she was, and if Paul had left to drive home to Brooklyn.

"He is a nice young man for you, Blair," your mother said.  Your father did not offer any opinion.  Sheila was sort of happy for her sister to find a nice guy.

You moved through the living room towards the bay window where you sat and gazed outside, reminiscing about Paul's visit.  You had a lot to think about.  You thought about Paul coming into your life at a time when nothing was positive.  It was unsettling and you were not ready to take on a relationship, especially one with Paul who lived in Brooklyn.

Paul wanted to share his life with Blair. It was all too clear, why Paul had come all the way from New York to see her.  He was serious.  He may or may not have done a great job presenting enough good reasons to marry him.  But Paul was sure there could be no other one for Blair, or for himself.  He would work hard, care for her.  He would protect her from her demons and fears.  Paul came from a very good family.

The days and weeks that followed brought winter closer.  Soon the Christmas holiday season, then New Years 1956/57.  Still no hope!   The New York winter was cold and long as usual.  Paul wondered how Blair was doing, but the days brought no promise.  They only dashed any hopes that Paul and Blair could be together.

Perhaps you wished Paul would not be so intense about everything and thereby avoided any    premonition of an engagement or of developing a lifetime commitment.

Before you knew it, spring, with all it had to offer, had arrived.   By then, Paul had stopped writing.  And you hadn't written at all.

While at your house had Paul seen the bundle of his letters tied with blue ribbon on the lamp table in the living room?  Surely that indicated he was ever present in your thoughts.  Had he wondered why the letters were out on the table?  Did he think you had been re-reading them?

Paul did see the letters.  He doesn't miss much.  He chose not to bring it to Blair's attention.

Would things have been different if you had let Paul know how you felt about him?  Could it have been possible that you needed him, the compassionate, caring guy that he was?  Were you afraid to get more involved?

For Paul, living in New York City in July was not easy.  He couldn't bear the heat and humidity. Paul knew he would move to Providence in a heartbeat.

Out of the blue, Paul received a letter from Blair telling him she would be at the Concord Hotel in the Catskill Mountains in two weeks.  Paul was so excited!  He just happened to have a club date playing in a hotel just down the road.  He went out of his mind.   This could not be happening!  It had been so long since Paul had heard from Blair.

A good friend of Blair's wanted to spend four days up at the Concord.  The Concord was the in place for young single people.  Cuban music played around the clock and people stayed up half the night.  Big name entertainers performed at the club which was populated mostly by New Yorkers.  The Concord was an exciting place to meet "Guys and Dolls".

Paul called Blair that evening.  Her mother answered the phone and politely instructed her daughter to answer the phone.  

"Blair, this is Paul," he said.

During the hour-long phone conversation, Paul promised he would come to see you. He would be able to spend a little time with you before he had to return to work at his hotel.

What luck, thought Paul that he would be able to see you in the Catskills.  It was all arranged.

He could not imagine you being there.  Too many flashy girls from New York went there to look for a husband.  This was his backyard.  To Paul, you were "Miss America from Rhode Island".

Lately, Paul had experienced some job-related disappointments, changing jobs, not getting an opportunity to go out and call on offices to sell office products.  Not hearing from you only made matters worse . Things had become even more uncertain.

Once again it was. "On again, off again".  When he heard the song, "I‘ve Got the World on a String",  he was able to relate to the lyrics.  He felt then he was on your string!  It may not have been true, but that was how it felt.

The two weeks went by fairly well for Paul as he contemplated seeing you.  Perhaps fooling himself into thinking your relationship would change for the better.

Paul arrived at his hotel.  He put his drums and tuxedo in a room they gave the band members then drove directly to the Concord Hotel.  Being familiar with the daily routines of  hospitality, he knew exactly where he would find Blair.

The lunch hour was just about over and Paul figured you might not have left the dining room yet.  Lunch at the Concord was like a convention.  Paul rushed past people who where coming out, as he tried to get in.

Paul searched the dining room and there you were!  Talking to some guy.  The young man took one look at Paul and knew there was something between the two of you.

"Hello, Blair."  Paul stood before you somewhat embarrassed. "How are you?" he asked.

"I see you found me," Blair answered not taking her eyes off of him.

"It wasn't hard." His eyes were all over you, like adjusting to a bright spotlight.

You stood and Paul followed you out of the dining room, through the lobby then outside.

You walked together along the driveway lined with old elm trees.  Paul could not explain his feelings to anyone.  It was like magic, the two of you joined together by chance.  Perhaps the stars in the heavens could render some support.  Paul reached out and kissed you like a soldier home from combat.  He kissed you over and over.  You both remembered Cape Cod.  It now seemed like it was only moments that you were apart.  You Pushed aside the passing of time and embraced the present.

Other guys would have given up a long time ago, but not Paul.  His trust in people was more than usual.  Perhaps that was what made Paul different.  He was every bit like his father, who had once bought a car with only a five dollar deposit.  Paul trusted people and people trusted him.           

Paul had to get back to rehearse with his band. There really wasn't much time left.  The afternoon came and went and Paul was happy again.  His words came from the heart, "I promise you all my love, Blair.  It is all for you."

Paul left you standing by an elm near the hotel's main entrance.  Paul looked back more than once.  He did not see you crying.  You neither approved or disapproved of your visit together.

Just a few words from you would have made Paul yours forever and would have brought him as much happiness as anyone is allowed.  If only you had expressed your feelings to Paul, that would have been enough for him to think there was a chance for the two of you to share a life together.

There had to be a reason. Why all the uncertainty? Yet destiny kept the two of you bonded together.  Still, some people can go with each other from 6 to 20 years without a formal commitment.

______________________

Back in his apartment in Brooklyn, Paul continued tearing off the months on his wall calendar.  There and then, he got on the telephone and called Providence.  Usually you were not home when he called.  All he could do was leave a message with your mother.

One sunny day Paul entered the lobby of his apartment, shutting out the noise of kids on roller skates outside of the entrance door.  As usual, his mailbox was stuffed with bills.  Paul thumbed through the envelopes and there is was, a letter from you.  He was shocked as always and stood deathly still.  Paul managed to get a grip on his emotions and proceeded to tear open the envelope, fully expecting a "Dear John" letter.

In the letter Blair wrote about a girlfriend of Sheila's who needed a favor:

"Paul, I thought you might want to drive her to my house.  We would have a chance to see each other again."

Paul called you that evening.  As much as he wanted to see you, he couldn't help but feel he was being used.  So he made up a story about being booked for weekend club dates and would not be able to come.  "I am sorry Blair, I can't do this."

He did not stay on the telephone for long.  Perhaps he expected too much from you, but he didn't know how to make you understand he wanted more than a casual relationship.  Paul was perfectly willing to be patient across the miles, until such time that he could join you and the two of you could plan for a future together.  But it was completely frustrating without a commitment from you, some visible indication of how you felt.

Besides the fact that Paul had a ways to go before he felt he himself was ready to get married. He wanted to know for sure how he was going to make a living.

The very next night Paul answered his telephone to find you on the other end.

"I have decided now is the time for me to move to Boston.  I have been sending out resumes to the department stores and I expect a reply soon."

That bit of news did not sit too well with Paul.  As he once suspected, this would put you further apart from him.  There was nothing left to say or do.  He knew your mind was made up to do just that.  It was apparent you did not  consider Paul in your plans.

Paul needed to let go.  He could not do it at that moment in time.  He felt pretty sure he had lost his battle, there were way too many doubts.  Paul did not dare admit it to himself but his practical side told him to prepare for the break-up. 

All he could say before the call ended was, "Good luck.  Take care of yourself."

Paul had gone to North Hollywood in California to see his parents. He stayed two weeks and had a good time getting around Hollywood.  Returning home on a Sunday, Paul picked up his mail only to find a letter from you who he no longer expected to hear from.  The letter announced your arrival in New York next Saturday to visit family.  Your cousin lived off of Eastern Parkway, only minutes from where Paul lived.  Funny, you had never mentioned a cousin living in Brooklyn.

You asked Paul to meet you at Grand Central Station at 10:45 on Saturday morning.

How could he refuse? You could have been coming home from Russia, the emotions would have been the same, if not greater.  Paul was once again willing to take the gamble.

Coming soon: CHAPTER XIV  
An unforgettable day together for our lovers in New York.

Marriage is like owning a beautiful gift shop.  Both husband and wife, adding, working to secure their investment in a marriage.  Profiting, receiving security, fringe benefits, children (management trainees), the parents of the partners (board of directors) It has always been a partnership that requires commitment and dedication.

I hope I have brought pleasurable reading in your leisure.

- N.H.G.

A Summer in Time: Table of Contents